Manolo Blahnik. Kate Spade. Mad Housewife?

"In marketing I've seen only one strategy that can't miss -- and that is to market to your best customers first, your best prospects second and the rest of the world last."
- John Romero

Marketing fascinates me.

Ever since I took an "Advertising and Society" class my senior year at [redacted], I've looked at advertisements with a more critical eye. I also received the worst grade on any paper in my academic career in that class because I focused too tightly on marketing in my research -- or at least that's the explanation the TA in the class gave.

It's all about appealing to the target demographic. Advertisers get brief chunks of time to make an impression, so message must be tightly targeted. You want to appeal to young men? Use scantily clad women (or perhaps scantily clad men). You want to appeal to older men? Mention a life free from prostate trouble. You want to appeal to middle-aged folks? Get them worried about either paying for children and retirement, or remind them that they can still feel young. And then there's the John Mellencamp-themed Chevy ads. (You know the one: "This is awrrrr counnnntreeeeeee."). They seem to annoy as many people as the Applebee's "Gilligan's Island" spots -- so I'm yet to figure where they're aimed…

So what does this have to do with wine? Women account for 57% of wine sales in the US, and most female consumers of wine drink what they buy almost immediately. According to Leslie Sbrocco, author of "Wine for Women," women "look for the experience" in wine. "We think about who we're with, what we're eating," she said. "Women buy visually, paying attention to packaging. They look for a transition between day and night, work and play."

Wine sellers are quick on the uptake. Interesting labels, odd bottle shapes, funky names for wines -- these are aimed at casual wine drinkers and/or people who tend to consume wines not long after purchase, since those two demographics make up the majority of wine sales. A typical, old-school cursive covered bottle with a proudly emblazoned vintage but no other "obvious" information isn't going to stand out while strolling the aisles of Liquor Direct.

Couple this notion with Sbrocco's thesis -- and you'll get a lot of wines marketed at women for "specific" use in particular environments. Now, I'm not going to claim knowledge of what those environments may be…I'll leave those to you to envision or share in the comments. That said, here are a few wines who clearly weren't marketed towards my gender:

Little Black Dress 2005 Chardonnay -- From their publicity, "Fashioned specifically to capture the pure essence of what a woman wants in a wine, Little Black Dress signifies all that is elegant, confident, sexy and today." Pretty bold statement for an $8 bottle. Is it "sexy and today?" I have no clue, but it's decent. It comes off the hangar with a nose like a buttery chard -- creamy and citrusy. It's medium bodied for a chardonnay, and makes no bones about being Californian. There's plenty of toasty oak in this wine. However, instead of becoming buttery, it's turns more crisp -- an interesting mix of European and American styling. The finish is oaky and somewhat dry. We had this one with some grilled swordfish and yellow rice and it went quite nicely.

Mad Housewife 2005 Cabernet Sauvignon -- "This is your time. Time to enjoy a moment to yourself. A moment without the madness." Perhaps this is a reworking of the Stones' "Mother's Little Helper," but hey -- whatever gets you through. Actually, this is a very decent Cabernet. It's nothing spectacular, but very approachable. The Mad Housewife has a fragrant nose of currants and blackberries. There's a nice fruity taste with just an edge of tannin. Finish is slightly dry. The Sweet Partner in Crime said that she found it "Zin-ish, but not quite that strong a flavor." It's a $10 bottle, which is probably about right for the quality.

Bitch 2005 Grenache -- I remember the first time I saw this wine. I was wandering down the Australian wine aisle when I spotted this bright pink label with "Bitch" delicately scripted. I had a hard time running this wine down to review -- as it tends to sell pretty briskly, for reasons I would need a second "X" chromosome to properly understand. When did "bitch" become a term of endearment? I used that word to describe that Advertising and Society TA for a decade. That all changed when TA-Bitch became the Sweet Partner in Crime ten years later, but that's a story for another day.

That said, this is a much fruitier, heavier wine than I expected from a straight Grenache. Most Grenaches tend to be on the light side, but this one refuses to take a back seat. (Apparently, Grenache is also a bitch to grow…) Blindfolded, I'd think might be a more manly zinfandel, but Bitch brings the strength. At 15% alcohol -- this is not a wine to be trifled with. The nose is full of brandy-covered plums. There's some licorice to go with the fruit when you taste, and the finish is surprisingly dry. Nice tannin. $11-12.

Of course, since I'm male, you can probably discount most of what I say above. I'll do a followup column on manly wines soon. Suggestions are welcome…

The Sideways Source

A bit of a departure from recent entries…

I’ve not read a wine writer yet who’s completely avoided referencing "Sideways.” Since this film became part of the popular culture, pinot noirs got expensive, people stopped drinking merlot, and tour buses by the hundreds descended on Santa Barbara County to follow the path blazed by Miles and Jack. There are readily available maps with which which you can hit every stop in the movie -- from the Hitching Post to "Frass Canyon Winery" (which is actually Fess Parker) where Miles dumped the spit bucket on his head to the Best Western where they stayed

I had the good fortune last week to travel LA to meet up with my sweet partner in crime as she was finishing a conference -- and we decided that we'd head north on the 101. (For those of you who have never been to Southern California, folks out there refer to freeways as something you find around the house -- the kitchen table, the family dog, the dishwasher, "the 5," "the 10," "the 405," "the 101," and so on…)

We did not wish to follow the Sideways trail. We did a little research beforehand and asked a few friends for recommendations. We ended up floating from winery to winery, sampling and learning as we went. My lessons from the trip?

* The best tasting rooms are at the wineries themselves.
* Tasting rooms specializing in local wineries without their own tasting rooms often yield gems.
* The pinot noirs out there are incredible wines. Corollary: The pinot noirs out there are also expensive wines in relation to what I usually write about.
* When I went to Sonoma last year, I barely drank zinfandel -- then I fell in love with the stuff. The same thing happened to me in Santa Barbara with syrah.
* There were actually some wines out there that fall into Vine price ranges -- and it would be unfair of me to simply keep them to myself. So, a few highlights in no particular order…

Cellar 205 -- One of our first stops, Cellar 205 is a wine co-op tucked away on a back street in Santa Barbara. Three different winemakers produce their wines here. Carr Winery specializes in pinot noir -- their pinot is very complex and range from delicate to chewy. They also make a very tasty sauvignon blanc. (We bought a bottle of the pinot for a special occasion.) Bargiel focuses more on syrah -- big, hearty wines. Our favorite was Oreana. Oreana makes a range of wines -- the most memorable, for me, was simply called "?" -- as it's made from a different blend of grapes every year. This wine was one of the more inexpensive we ran into out there -- $10 a bottle. For the price, it was unbeatable. This wine would be perfect to bring to a party, open in the evening with some chocolate, or just kick back and drink. Lots of berries and fruit, soft tannins, and hearty without being overpowering. We ended up with a case of the stuff.

Giessinger -- A funky little place on State Street in Santa Barbara, Giessinger made wines that, in the words of one of our tastresses (both of whom had the same birthday) are "not your average wines." I would echo that sentiment. We got a bottle of their syrah -- which actually had a fairly strong flavor of mint to it. I'm waiting to get some lamb chops for this wine, since we wouldn't need the mint jelly to go with it. At $10 a pop, it seemed like a pretty good investment to me. They made a few other very nice whites, as well Giessinger's specialty is dessert wines, which aren't usually my speed. But with wines named "Forgiveness" and "Surrender" -- trying them became a must.

Zaca Mesa -- Zaca Mesa, north of Los Olivos on Foxen Canyon Road, focuses on what are considered "Rhone varietals." The climate in that area is very much like the south of France -- blazing hot in the day, cool and breezy by night.They grow the same grapes there -- syrah, mourvedre, Grenache, rousanne, viognier, etc. Our new friend Brian led us through the tasting soon after an extended conversation with us about the Bengals being underdogs against the Ravens. They made a viognier that started with a wonderful floral and fruit nose, which then became wonderfully crisp and refreshing. Their blends, Z Cuvée and Z Three, were extraordinarily tasty and full wines. But their syrah stood alone on top. Syrah is normally a powerful, fruity, earthy wine. When you taste a syrah, you're going to get a very strong flavor of…well…something, generally – these are not meek wines. Zaca Mesa…these folks made a syrah that's very different. Their syrahs weren't overpowering in the slightest -- in fact, these wines had some of the best combinations and balances of flavors I've ever had. Almost all of their syrahs could be termed "elegant." Most of their wines are out of the Vine range -- but when we were there, they were selling off the last of the 2001 vintage -- which was an incredibly good wine, but needs to be drunk soon. We got it on sale -- so it came out to about $10 a bottle. If I need to take a bottle of wine somewhere in the next few months -- this is coming with me. It's astoundingly good.

Curtis -- Half a mile up the road from Zaca Mesa, Curtis Winery also focuses on Rhone varietals -- and our taster, Jason, showed us a very pleasant time while we were there. They also produce an exceptional syrah and small batches of various other Rhone wines. We were most struck by their cuvées. Cuvée is WineSpeak for "blend" and, as mentioned above -- these are usually very tasty, very up-front, easy drinking wines. Curtis makes three of them: the "Heritage Cuvée," a red with a smoky cherry and vanilla taste; the "Heritage Blanc," a white, somewhat like a viognier on the nose, but with a crisper taste and a longer finish; and their "Heritage rose," made from the same grapes as the red and striking you with tasty berries and grapefruit. All these wines were relatively inexpensive ($12-16) and make for a wonderful introduction to some of their other wines, which are a little pricier but, again, quite worth it.

And while the following wineries aren't in this column's price range, they certainly bear a mention: Sunstone -- the most attractive winery that we visited. Sunstone is just north of Solvang – best known as California's Dutch version of Gatlinburg. We tasted the best rose we'd ever had at Sunstone and a wine called "Eros" that was…well...exactly that. Shoestring is a new winery located smack dab on the road between Buellton and Solvang. They were tasting their first releases when we visited. If the early returns are any indication, this winery is certainly one to keep an eye on. Their syrah paired with dark chocolate was particularly divine. The winery also starred Scooter the Aussie, who kept an eye on the place from his perch atop one of the barrels in the warehouse. Finally, Foley, in the somewhat less radical climate west of Buellton on the way to Lompoc, produces absolutely marvelous pinot noir. We bought ourselves our favorite pinot on the trip at Foley.

If you'd like a taste of some of these wines, you can purchase most of them online. Be forewarned, we had a lot of trouble finding a winery that would ship directly to us in Kentucky. In Northern California wine country, they have visitors from all over and they've got "authorized third-party shippers" to deal with the weird blue laws in the Bluegrass and other states. In Southern California, most of their wine tasting traffic is local, so getting the permits isn't worth it. We had to find some hypothetically creative ways to get our booty home. (Best bet -- find a trustworthy friend in Ohio and ship there…you can ship unlimited quantities to places across the river.)

Pay the homepages of these wineries a visit and read their stories -- you'll like them. Each winery had a tale to tell -- and the thrill of firsthand discovery made for a very memorable mini-vacation.

Back to the reviews next time. Until then, don't drink and dial…

The Sun Also Rises...and so does my glass.

Spanish wines, among many other sensual pleasures of that great nation, became well known to the world in the writings of Hemingway. ("This wine is too good for toast-drinking, my dear. You don't want to mix emotions up with a wine like that. You lose the taste." -- The Sun Also Rises) And Papa certainly had good taste. In addition, since October is Hispanic Heritage Month -- Spanish wine becomes a natural fit for this week.

Spain is the world's third largest wine producer. Spain has a long, storied history of wine production -- but only in the last ten years or so have these wines really started to gain a solid foothold around the globe. The Iberian Peninsula has historical evidence of wine dating to around 1100, but if you're a Biblical scholar, Noah supposedly planted the first vineyard 5000 or so years ago.

"Modern" winemaking came to Spain in the 1850's and 1860's. As longtime readers will astutely recognize, that was the approximate time of the phylloxera outbreak in France. (For my new readers -- phylloxera is a species of louse that wiped out huge portions of the European vineyards over 150 years ago. Jump back to my article on Chilean wine to read more.) French winemakers, fleeing the devastation of our little pest, crossed the Pyrenees in droves, bringing grapes and know-how with them. Spain's vineyards were largely spared until the turn of the century, when phylloxera eventually made the migration across the mountains. The vineyards made it through in much better shape, and the techniques were in place to craft wonderful wine. In the last 30 years, Spain has also benefited greatly from the technological Renaissance that has done so much for South American wines.

Spain started producing a great deal of quality, easy-to-find, easy-on-pocketbook wines in the last ten years or so. The winemaking tradition in Spain was to age wines for a long time in oak before bottling -- creating a number of mediocre wines where the subtleties were overrun by the wood. Spain has been quicker on the trigger to release wines in recent years -- although Spanish wines do tend to improve with a little aging. If you see "Crianza" on a bottle of Spanish wine, it's been aged at least two years. "Reserva" indicated three years aging, and "Reserva Especial" is at least five years old.

Spain has two major red varietals -- Tempranillo and Garnacha. Garnacha is the same grape as Grenache, which is the backbone of many of the best French Rhone wines. Also from France comes the nomenclature -- as many Spanish wines are named after their locale. The best known region for French red is Rioja, although Peñedes is another big producer. Navarra and Campo de Borja are also up and comers. Spanish reds are often earthy and fruity, and you'll rarely find a red that doesn't at least have some wood with the tannin.

Among whites, the two most common varieties are Albariño and Verdejo. Albariño creates very perfumey, wonderful whites -- much like viognier. Verdejo is a very interesting grape -- like a less-acidic sauvignon blanc with some pepper thrown in. It's often blended with sauvignon blanc. There is also a wonderful sparkling wine, cava, made in Spain -- but I'll come back to that later.

Historically, Spain is best known for Sherry. Sherry is a fortified wine (often upwards of 20% alcohol) that's made from a neutral grape brandy added to wine after initial fermentation. Another fortified wine from Spain is Madeira -- which was used by George Washington to toast the Declaration of Independence. These wines certainly deserve further study…

For this week, three wines -- ranging in region, variety, and color.

Artazuri 2005 Garnacha -- As I mentioned, Garnacha is the same grape as Grenache -- backbone of many of the big earthy French wines. In Spain, however, Garnacha delivers a very different character. Rather than the earthy smell of this varietal's French cousins, the Artazuri, grown in Navarra, comes straight at you with bright, fruity character. The nose of this wine is wonderful -- while there's a touch of earth, the overwhelming scent is of black cherries and plums. The medium body of this wine is peppery and fruity -- zinfandelesque. The finish is long and a little spicy, with the cherry flavors from the body hanging around a good while. While I probably wouldn't pair this with a steak, barbecue would go fantastically well with this, as would, I think, a curry that's got some potatoes or other earthy veggies in it. This wine would be extremely food friendly, so you can't go wrong -- as long as the food has a little bit of heft to it. And for $9-11, anyone at a party would be happy with this. I also think you could buy several and easily hold on to this for six months or a year, and you'd really have something.

Borsao 2005 Rosé -- I've been long overdue for a rosé review, and I figured I might as well look at one since there's such good red grape stock here in Spain (and since I enjoyed my last Spanish rosé so much). Borsao's rosé is made from 100% Garnacha grown in the Campo de Borja region. This dark pink entry greets you with a floral nose that includes some easy peach scents. This wine's gentle first taste is very light and includes more of that nice ripe fruit. The taste lingers briefly before spreading into a long, citrusy, slightly spicy finish that includes some hints of cinnamon. While this would be a perfect summer wine -- as the weather starts to turn colder, pull out some Mediterranean style recipes and do some roasting: whether it's a slow-cooked chicken, an earthy chickpea and eggplant dish, or some marinated pork chops. There's a braised monkfish recipe I once put together that I think would go wonderfully here, and you can find a bottle of Borsao for between $6-8. A good, flexible entry.

Las Brisas 2005 Blanco -- Might Las Brisas is from the Rueda region, and -- while it's getting a little late in the year to discuss a wine this light -- keep this one in your memory banks until next year rolls around and the weather starts warming up and you can kick back outdoors again. The lively Las Brisas is one of those aforementioned blends of Verdejo and Sauvignon Blanc, and has a lot of the recognizable character of the latter. The grapefruitiness of a sauvignon is certainly present on the nose, but it's somewhat mellower, balanced by a mangoish scent. It's a very light wine -- a little tart and lemony, but the acidity mellows quickly into a fruity peppery body and a strong, flavorful finish. This would be a wonderful aperitif or poolside wine, but if you have any kind of fish dish -- I had this with a baked cod -- you're going to be in business. You could also consider a cheese tortellini, or most any kind of Spanish dish that doesn't involve beef or pork. Probably plan to spend $8-10 on this very easygoing, happy wine.

So lift a glass of Spanish wine this week, and until next time…Arriba!